City Of The Dead (funeral/loss theme, originally titled "Memphis")

Another sleepless night
thinking about you again
after more than 25 years
you still curse me
city of the dead, marching toward your own funeral
drugs, racism, insanity
and yet you proudly march on
seems fitting since I lost so much there
including my soul

Back to the place where I lost it all-again
Can't go back, another funeral again
seems I only went back there when someone was dead or dying
seems fitting since I lost so much there
including my soul

grandparents, parents, sister, what's next?
what would you expect in the city of the dead?
so what if my mother, MLK, and Elvis died at the same hospital?
I don't care to join them

whoever said walking through the streets of this town was magical and fun
never stepped in my shoes
from getting beat up in high school
to getting mugged 10 feet off of Beale
waiting for the quake to destroy this place
and end the suffering

watched my sister go from normal to insane
watched my family wither and die
and they wonder why I left
that place was never my home even for the decade I was there
they said my formative years were there
which is why I'm the ogre I am now

Maybe New York, Louisville, and Baltimore messed me up too
maybe I shouldn't have moved back to my other childhood home
but they're still better than the hellhole on the bluffs

don't know why my thoughts went back there
maybe it's time to let the dead bury their dead
and get on with my own life

Written by Thomas Clarke between May 3-September 6, 2015